There will be many milestones observed during the pandemic. Births, deaths, weddings, birthdays, and more will be celebrated in a slightly altered way, or postponed, or just not observed at all because of the pandemic. We are sheltered in place, reliant on many different forms of communication to check in on friends and families. We've seen a little resurgence in the written greeting, phone calls are frequent, computers and tablets are zooming or running social media all day, everyday. People are reaching out to recognize special occasions or just to stay in touch. Some are being very creative in the way they celebrate those special milestones.
And so it was that I found myself getting a little teary eyed yesterday as I waited in a line of cars and trucks assembling to drive by my son's house to honk, yell, wave out a Happy 30th Birthday greeting on the day that his wife had planned, over a year ago, as his big surprise birthday party day. The pandemic had changed those plans, and instead we were doing a pop-up drive-by. Not a reason to tear up? Stay with me for a moment.
The wait was only about 10 minutes and the drive by lasted a couple of minutes longer. In those couple of minutes I had time to truly realize all that had occurred in the 30 years we were there to celebrate. No, it wasn't a true walk down memory lane, but more of a realization of the friendship and love amassed on this one, unsuspecting neighborhood. It was the realization that we often joke with the 30 yr old about his social nature, but watching the cars as they kept coming and filling the street it was easy to see it was important to them to share a brief greeting with their friend, uncle, son-in-law. They care as much about him as he cares about them.
There isn't any one type of friend in his mind. He has built his life upon an openness to what life has to offer and to those people who are open to explore life with him. I cannot count the number of times chores, schoolwork, and other common day responsibilities went by the wayside when faced with an amazing invitation. And almost all invitations were amazing. His history with those invitations is in all of these cars. There are the in laws, parents, sister, niece and nephew, cops, truck drivers, town workers, a biophysicist, hockey players (lots of hockey players), sales people and more. There are monster trucks, compact cars, SUV's, balloons, signs, and flags waving. The one common thread - the 30 yr old celebrating his birthday.
Back to my tears - they were happy tears. They were tears for all of the years we feared his adventures may hamper his ability to get to the next year. They were tears for his middle school promise of always staying on the right side of the naughty/just plain bad line. He always honored that. They are tears of realization that his instinct on the goodness of people who came in and out of his life were always good instincts. This was evidenced in the cars and trucks of the parade. As a very diverse crowd, that was the other thing they all have in common. They are all good people, good friends, people he is lucky to have in his life.
So as we celebrate his 30 years in a very different way than planned, the message is still the same. These people are important to him and he to them. I have every trust many of these folks will be around in another 30 years and there will be new ones added along the way. Friendship does not change in a pandemic. We may have to express it a little differently now and most likely in our new normal to come. They will be there.
Thank you for the 30 years, the life lessons, and the happy tears.
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